February 21, 2011

S.O.S.

Although some of you may not know it, I have been going through an incredibly difficult time as of late. I haven't talked about it with very many people because its hard to put into words what I am dealing with. Just recently it has completely come to a head, but looking back my struggles have been there all along.

The good news is I have reached out to people and have formed a great support network of individuals who are ready and willing to help me. Best of all these people is my wonderful husband who has endured a lot of loneliness lately because I have had nothing to give him. He's offered up lots of hugs, a strong shoulder to cry on, and he has turned the other way when my behavior has been perplexing and downright absurd.

To say that life is overwhelming for me right now is an understatement. I have barely been treading water...I am about up to my nose and I dare not breathe for fear of being overcome....BUT I have been thrown a life ring and I have fixed my eyes on it...its within my grasp and I can't wait to feel the sweet relief that it is going to bring me.

the last couple of days have been filled with tears of relief and release. A lot of ugly crying going on over here. That cathartic, face twisting, letting go of built up tension. It feels good.



I can't wait to have a new normal. Just knowing that its coming has brought new optimism to my days.

2 comments:

Mrsuglesich said...

Hey! If you need anything just let me know... and also if you ever need me to take those two babies of yours for a few hours so you and Derrick can have some time together or just to have some time to yourself let me know! Especially during the week because I am home all day everyday by myself until James gets home on Fridays. So even in the evening I can watch them. I am here if you need me! Even if you guys are just going to hang out at home I am more than willing to take them. Let me know!

Jana said...

Thank you so much Libby! I really appreciate it! The offer is the same on our end too. If you ever want us to come over and relieve you for a couple of hours let us know :)