February 25, 2011

Here I Am

I recently talked about going through some tough times, and feeling overwhelmed. Its been a couple weeks of rediscovering myself in light of some new information. I am discovering a lot of new things, and also having some real a-ha! moments e.i. "that totally makes sense to me now!" I am also having to accept some things about myself that I wish were different, but are just a matter of fact when it comes to "me" Part of that is embracing the things about me that are positive in light of the way they can be negative....am I being vague? Probably a little. I am not quite ready to just jump out there with it. That will take some time for me.

I now know why I am obsessed with interior design, and why it is so important for me that things be so aesthetically pleasing...without getting all medical on you....its part of my neurobiology. I seek order and an environment that is easy on my eyes. The part of my brain that makes me so keen on these things also sometimes keeps me from accomplishing the very things I desire in my own home. A sad reality.

housewife cleaning

I have decided to stop living my life through my blog. I love my blog, and it has been a fabulous escape for me. Something I really needed in order to cope with dis-order in my environment. Living in under 400sq ft with 4 people is really trying, and although we are making the best of it, it's magnified some of my organizational shortcomings.

So from here on out I am going to keep it more real ...I know, I know those of you who know me well wonder if it gets any more real than it already is...how bout dirty underwear and ground in cheerios on the floor. Don't worry! I wont post pictures of that....

My true desire is to be more transparent. My blog allows me to highlight the best of myself, but I am going to be more open to showing the mediocre too. After all my tagline is "keeping it together while looking good" but I think we all know that a lot of times I am keeping it together while looking just ok.

Friends I hope you will come along with me on my journey. The future is still bright even if its messy!

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